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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24955609">Welcome To My Life</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellekim94/pseuds/ellekim94'>ellekim94</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sun and Moon [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dysfunctional Family, Gen, YuTaeJohnIl!Friendship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 09:40:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,419</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24955609</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellekim94/pseuds/ellekim94</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Taeil's life as a fifteen year old son, brother, and friend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Taeyong/Moon Taeil, Moon Taeil/Nakamoto Yuta, Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sun and Moon [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1796563</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Welcome To My Life</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is my compensation to the lack of YuTaeJohnIl!Friendship in the first two parts. It's a flashback/prequel set before part one and part two.</p>
<p>Title is Simple Plan's song.</p>
<p>Do enjoy reading.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It wasn’t Taeil’s heavy footsteps against the hallway leading to Youngho’s room or the way his door suddenly, violently flew open that alarmed the bassist when he saw his best friend that afternoon back when they were still sophomores in middle school. It was the vocalist’s message ten minutes earlier: <em>I am fucking done.</em></span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He knew Taeil’s situation at home wasn’t the best. It wasn’t even ideal. But he also knew how much Taeil loved his family, even his pain of a brother. He knew how much Taeil was putting up because he cared about them. He had seen Taeil give up a lot of things because of his younger brother. He had also seen Taeil cry because of his family, in pain or in frustration or in a lot of other things a fifteen-year old shouldn’t be forced to feeling.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">That’s why Youngho was more than wary when he received that message.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Then, Taeil was in his room ten minutes later, face so red he looked like he just confessed. Later on, Youngho would find out that he <em>did </em>confess. It was not just that confession that someone would expect happened to a middle school sophomore. Youngho didn’t even know if Taeil had the time or energy to like someone at this point.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What did Taehyun do this time?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“He sold <em>Yuna</em>.<em>” </em>Yuna was Taeil’s doberman. She had been with Taeil since after their grade school graduation. He was attached to her and Taeil loved her dearly. “I got mad. I asked him <em>why. </em>Do you know what he said to me? He said I’m just being a <em>bitch.</em>”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho didn’t know if he was more irritated that Taehyun <em>got away </em>again with selling Taeil’s dog — he didn’t have to ask about it, he knew Taeil’s parents just as much as he knew Taeil’s brother — or that Taehyun called his older brother <em>that</em>.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“And do you know what my mother said? She said I <em>should </em>just forgive Taehyun,” Taeil continued. He hadn’t even sat. He was standing, looking furiously at Youngho who was sitting on his bed. It was obvious he was mad but he also looked like he was about to cry. “I wasn’t able to stop myself. I said, <em>I’m sorry, </em>forgiveness? You don’t want forgiveness from me. You want fucking intolerance. I could still remember all the things he did to me. I haven’t forgiven him. I just learned how to tolerate him. <em>You </em>taught me how to tolerate him. And now that I don’t want to tolerate him anymore, you appeal to me for forgiveness? As if I am the one with the problem here? As if I’m the only one with the problem here? I have tolerated him for fifteen years of my life. Everything he said and everything he did was tolerated because you told me to be the better person, to be the one who understands more, because you expected more from me. Guess what? I’m done with that bullshit.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho didn’t know if it would have or it would have <em>not</em> looked more pitiful if Taeil had not ended up sobbing after telling him what he told his mother, when he just dropped to the floor and cried, muttering about what would he do now without <em>Yuna</em>, that she was the only reason he looked forward going home, that she was the only one who cared about him and loved him.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What if they hurt her?” Taeil asked Youngho in between hiccups, looking up at him now that he was sitting awkwardly at the floor. “What if they don’t feed her?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“If your brother sold her for a good price, she’d probably be in a place where her food won’t be a problem,” Youngho seriously answered after a while, looking at Taeil and wondering how could a person worry more about the dog — okay, granted <em>his </em>dog — than the reality of the household he was living in.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">After Taeil calmed himself, Youngho told him, “Taeyong and Yuta are coming over.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, did you guys have a plan? I’m sorry I —”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I just called them over after you arrived,” Youngho interrupted him, knowing what Taeil was going to say. He had already <em>also </em>told them the gist of what happened and the two more than eagerly dropped whatever they were doing and answered in positive that they would be there in ten minutes. “We’re going to play.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“We are?”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“<em>We are</em>,” Youngho clarified, sighing. “<em>You are </em>going to sing.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho knew wherever Taehyun had brought Yuna, they couldn’t bring her back anymore, or even find her even if they tried. He also knew that fourteen year old was a young age to run away from home. He wouldn’t suggest that to Taeil even though he was already close to asking his parents if they wanted to have another son who was one year older than Youngho. He knew there wasn’t much he, or they, could do. He couldn’t plead to the heavens to give Taeil a family that he deserved, or give Taeil to a family that deserved him.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What are we going to play?” Taeyong asked excitedly. He especially looked at Taeil.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They could, however, be there for him. Youngho didn’t know how that could help solve anything. He didn’t have any answers. But if they could just be there for Taeil, he thought they should do that least.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“<em>Welcome To My Life</em>?” Taeil quietly suggested.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I like that!” Yuta agreed with a grin, sitting behind his drums. “I love that song!”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They might have played forty rounds of <em>Welcome To My Life </em>that afternoon until evening before Youngho’s mother called the four of them for dinner. She asked if they would all be staying over. Taeyong and Yuta were already planning games for their unplanned sleepover but Youngho was still looking over at Taeil’s direction because he hadn’t answered yet.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll call your mother you’re staying the night, okay?” Youngho’s mother told Taeil with a kind smile. She reached her hand to Taeil’s. “You can go home tomorrow.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Taeyong and Yuta were already snoring at the floor with tangled blankets when they finally decided that two in the morning was about the right time to sleep and they wouldn’t be wasting their precious sleepover time. Meanwhile, Youngho and Taeil were on the bed, lying side by side and both staring at the ceiling.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t want to be somebody else though,” Taeil softly whispered.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Huh?” Youngho slightly turned to look at me, confused.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“In the song, it said ‘<em>Do you wanna be somebody else?’</em>,” the other explained quietly, still looking at ceiling. “If I’m somebody else, you guys will not be my friends.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho wanted to ask if being friends with them in this life was enough to endure being a son and a brother to his family but he was young and the question was complicated even to his own mind. He settled on the warmth that was building in his chest because of what Taeil said and brought his gaze back up at the ceiling. He didn’t know what Taeil was seeing there but when he looked up at it, he pondered if they were seeing the same thing. For Youngho, he imagined a life without this band playing one song in <em>forty </em>different versions and he didn’t like that.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He was still thinking about it when he heard Taeil’s sleepy voice mumbling, “Thank you, guys.”</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He figured perhaps it wasn’t enough to solve anything but it was enough to get through the night and sometimes, that’s just what <em>should </em>be done. Not forgive anyone he didn’t want to forgive, or be forced to tolerate something he didn’t like.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho didn’t know it but Taeil imagined a life without the four of them in Youngho’s room at two in the morning. He thought of a life without them and he didn’t like that. They were both thinking the same thing, after all.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Taeil, what are we next going to play?” Yuta’s voice was slurred in sleepiness.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“<em>Welcome To My Life,</em>” Taeyong answered.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Youngho had to look at the two in the floor to make sure they were asleep. <em>They were</em>. It looked like it wasn’t just him and Taeil thinking the same thing. Even in their dreams, he was certain Taeyong and Yuta were also thinking the same thing. He glanced at Taeil again and saw him sleeping soundly, snoring lightly. He looked at the ceiling once more before he closed his eyes.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He liked this life.</span>
</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I love it when the members show their love for Taeil. I always feel like Taeil is not getting enough love, the love that he deserves.</p>
<p>He's not even my bias OTL</p>
<p>Anyway, what is a bias in NCT? *cries in 21 beautiful human beings*</p></blockquote></div></div>
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